The Seductive Trap of Optimism

I’m an optimist. I see the best in everything. I look at the world through rose-colored glasses.

As I’ve spent the last two years unpacking the wreckage of my last relationship, I’ve learned a difficult, damning lesson: When you look at the world through rose-colored glasses, red flags just look like flags.

Looking back over that relationship now, with the clarity of hindsight, I see a thousand red flags, a thousand warning signs that should have warned me—that might have warned someone more clear-eyed than I was—that this relationship was bound to be…